Twenty-five years ago I hosted two bankers from Russia to live in my home during an exchange program supported by the Boston bank I worked for. Oleg was a suave and savvy twenty-something from Moscow. Boris was a gray-haired fireplug of a man from Vladivostok. They were honored to be selected to come here to learn about the American banking system.
Their day life was filled with meetings and tours of banking back room operations of check clearing and reconciliation. Free time was dedicated to seeing Boston's historical sights. They joined my husband and me for dinner most nights. Great night life for Boris was glass of fine wine, thick steak, and a leisurely conversation with my husband--and yes, I felt the proverbial pat on my pert feminine head when I expressed an opinion to Boris or tried to enter said leisurely conversation. Hosting manners let his chauvinistic sleights roll off my back. Sure, my husband and I exchanged glances with a gentle reminder to Boris that American women are treated differently, but no one felt the need to wrestle anyone into submission if a point of view didn't change. Great night life for Oleg would have been spent at D.B.'s Golden Banana, a strip joint north of Boston, but, well, my hosting manners could only stretch so far.
With the recent news swirling around Russia, I find myself reflecting on our conversations and wondering if our shared experience provides any insight into current events.
For Boris dismissing my involvement with the bank as anything more than a cute little tour guide (I was a Vice President), I chalked up his chauvinism to a generational and cultural divide. I got a kick out of his shock when, toward the end of his stay, he learned I hold a doctorate in law. Even with his limited English, his old world manners expressed respect for my accomplishments even as he viewed me as a anomaly. He witnessed my professional life as an accomplished investment and cash manager at my bank, and he saw my personal life as a working mom, engaged in my community, and in a marriage of mutual support. I could see him take in what being an American woman meant. I don't know what the lives of Vladivostok women look like, but I had the sense their lives were not as multi-faceted as the lives of American women.
My most vivid memory of Boris came when he wanted to buy a gift for his wife. I took him to the jewelers building in downtown Boston. He sized the diamond ring for his wife by placing the ring on his sausage-shaped thumb. I can only imagine the heft of a woman attached to hands that such a ring would fit. My stature with that jeweler was forever sealed when Boris pealed off a wad of hundreds to pay the ring and matching bracelet.
But it was my interactions with Oleg that I think about the most these days. I remember him reading articles in the Wall Street Journal and asking questions about credit card fraud that populated the news then. I had the feeling my answers were logged away as more "how to" than "how to avoid." He insisted on coming with me on errands to a grocery store and marveled at the lack of lines and the stocked shelves, so much so we had to stop at another to satisfy himself that my grocery store was not a fluke or a government-sponsored set up. He was impressed that a whole store was devoted to health and personal care, and we spent several hours one day at a local CVS while he and the pharmacist walked the aisles in search of pills and tonics for Oleg's extended family. At Boston's Filene's Basement, he bought multiple pairs of new underwear and immediately threw out his old.
I had a lot of fun with Oleg. We sailed on a friend's boat out of Gloucester Harbor. After scoring a pair of roller blades at a local flea market, he and I bladed around quiet neighborhood streets. I saw sailing, knick-knacks, and suburbs. He saw harbor patrols, police surveillance at the flea market, neighborhood watch signs and town police cruisers. He wondered why Americans felt so free when we were being watched so carefully.
So, what do these memories lead me to in light of recent events? American life has long been the envy of the world. I had the feeling that all those many years ago, my Russian guests had their noses pressed against the glass, peering inside our lives to see what life could hold. They loved their country and were fierce defenders of its government...but still...
What I come away with is that envy is a scary thing. If what I felt from my two guests could fairly be an insight into the mindset of a country, then a green-eyed monster is not to be ignored.
Washington, D.C. – U.S. Senator John McCain (R-AZ), Chairman of the Senate Armed Services Committee, released the following statement on partisan attacks on the FBI and Department of Justice:
“In 2016, the Russian government engaged in an elaborate plot to interfere in an American election and undermine our democracy. Russia employed the same tactics it has used to influence elections around the world, from France and Germany to Ukraine, Montenegro, and beyond. Putin’s regime launched cyberattacks and spread disinformation with the goal of sowing chaos and weakening faith in our institutions. And while we have no evidence that these efforts affected the outcome of our election, I fear they succeeded in fueling political discord and dividing us from one another.
“The latest attacks on the FBI and Department of Justice serve no American interests – no party’s, no president’s, only Putin’s. The American people deserve to know all of the facts surrounding Russia’s ongoing efforts to subvert our democracy, which is why Special Counsel Mueller’s investigation must proceed unimpeded. Our nation’s elected officials, including the president, must stop looking at this investigation through the warped lens of politics and manufacturing partisan sideshows. If we continue to undermine our own rule of law, we are doing Putin’s job for him.”
